CD 18 - Ovulation?

Wow I promise I have not forgotten about this blog, it's just been a crazy roller coaster!

Yesterday morning I was growing concerned that I'd had all these O signs and no EWCM but I finally had some last night so it looks like I am O'ing/did O yesterday.

I will be testing on the 17th just because of all the signs but if it's negative I won't bother to test again unless I am having pregnancy symptoms or it's been 14 days since my CM dried up. Hoping this is it!!

And Again

Remember this?

It happened again.

She is due when I was due with my first miscarriage since the twins.

And now another cousin's girlfriend, whose child is not 1 yet, just announced they are expecting in April.

You know, the month I was due in before my miscarriage a little over a month ago?

I try so hard not to be bitter and mean. That's not who I want to be.

But it really hurts. Why couldn't that be me? Why do I miscarry and my cousins and their wives don't?

It isn't fair.

I just want to be pregnant again. I want to bring another beautiful soul into our family. I want to give my kids another sibling to grow with.

I feel like a complete failure that I can't do this now.

10/17

I am pretty excited because the date 10/17 keeps popping up and I feel like it's a sign maybe? Or maybe the date keeps popping up and I am just crazy thinking I see signs.

AF is still in town. A little odd to have it be this heavy this long, especially with all the bleeding I did last month. I just hope I am not in for a ton of bleeding this cycle and that AF sees herself out asap!

AF

On to cycle #6.